The system, method, and computer program product includes a first destination mail server for receiving a plurality of e-mail messages addressed to a first E-Mail address, the first destination mail server creating an action list digest of the plurality of e-mail messages and forwarding the action list digest to a second E-Mail address; and a second destination mail server for receiving the action list digest and permitting a reply of the action list digest from the second destination mail server to the first destination mail server to include control directives for processing of the e-mail messages on the first destination server identified in the action list digest. The invention may also be extended to other communications networks including standard telephone (POTS, PSTN), cellular, and wireless, broadband communications systems.