A method is disclosed for adaptively coupling processing components in a distributed system. In one aspect, a second component requests an interaction with a first component by sending a service access request to access a first service of the first component. The service access request specifies parameters relating to a proposed level of coupling between the first component and the second component. The second component receives a service response from the first component; the service response specifies counter-proposed parameters relating to a proposed level of coupling between the first component and the second component. The second component determines whether the service response indicates that the first service may be provided. If so, then an agreed-upon level of coupling is established between the first component and second component, and the components interact to receive the service. The level of coupling among the components may be re-negotiated at any time by exchanging values in a coupling context. As a result, a component can selectively and with fine granularity allow other components to access its data or services.